Narrative writing

Is class we have just started learning again about Narrative writing. We had to write a story about anything with some rules. Then we had to check with each other if it was good and give feedback.

The rules:
Language features (idiom metaphor etc)
Use paragraphs 
Your character has to speak 

Dingo and the explosion 

 As I the almighty Dingo the Dino looked up from my food a face of fear popped onto my face as I screamed out
 “Ahh”.
 she screamed as she saw the meteor flew right at her. Jimi the Jinzhousaurus was running up to everyone saying 
 “the end is here”. 

 I ran around looking for a shelter that would protect me from the gigantic burning rock. Then I looked at a cave and thought to myself that if I go in deep enough I will and barricade the entrance I might just stand a chance. When I started to barricade it slowly got darker and darker until there was just a little hole With a missing rock. 

 As I looked out I saw that the meteor was about to hit. So I plugged the missing hole and ran down as far as I could. While I was about half way down I heard a Thundering BOOM and CRASH.

 I went up the cave slowly and took the little rock out and looked out there. No one was there. I went and unplugged the entrance I looked around. It was like a wasteland out here. I sobbed and screamed out 
 “Why did this happen”. 
 I walked around looking for anyone. I finally found some water and drank some. I was so sad that I just feel into the water not caring at all. But when I got up I saw something in the distance. I ran and to my surprise it was a human and he was all alone. So I go up to him, he smiles at me and say 
 “Hi”
 “Hi” 
I say back The human freaks me out he then asks for my name, I say 
“Dingo the dino”. 
As we talk, we get to know each other and I found out that his name was jackson. So we go and live together until we are really old and we die. 

(my feedback)

 I like how you included the meteor I love how you made the story really funny Next time you could add the human talking